For a primer on my relationship, please go here. Its a little out of date (doesn’t include my new pup), but explains my version of poly and our relationship power structure pretty clearly.
The Initiation. Or, how to introduce someone to BDSM.
The photo above is from my #52weeksofkink project, where I explored new fetishes and kinks every week, documented with photos and writing. I’m pretty familiar with my kinks, so doing a serial project forced me to explore sexuality outside my comfort zone. It allowed me to learn new techniques and discovered new fetishes, like the very real #big-dick-humiliation. I highly recommend this approach for self-exploration into BDSM.
The structure of a serial project (1 new kink every week for a year) works really well for A-type control freaks, like me. But, if your partner hasn’t already taken the reigns of their sexual exploration, you might consider a different approach.
The Menu Approach
Borrowing from @foxbear‘s “the menu” (recommended reading!), consider putting together a list with your partner of their known kinks and fetishes. Then add things to the list they’re kinkurious about. And, finally, add your kinks to the list.
Explore your overlapping kinks, mentor your partner on your kinks, and explore the unknown kinks together. That might require research online, going to play parties, or leather events. Whatever you guys end up enjoying in this experiment, keep on the list.
Write about it
Whatever approach y’all take, I hope you document it. Writing is a wonderful form of reflection and can help you understand the why something is so hot to you.